Judd Apatow would probably like us to believe that bromances started with him. But in actuality, it’s been around since the first man realized he needed someone to bro out with when he wasn’t making the beast with two backs with his cavelady. To clarify, bromances isn’t a homosexual relationship, although I’m sure many supposed bromances have crossed over to that or danced around the category. But until there is confirmation, it still qualifies as a bromance, which is just a close friendship between two males. For an even better example, let’s take a look at the first category.
TV Bros: JD & Turk
Honorable Mention: Corey & Shawn
There’s been many great bromances on TV, but none has been as definitive as that of John “JD” Dorian and Christopher Turk. From their days in college to med school and then residency, no TV bros have supported each other as much as these two. They created a bike gang together, got matching bracelets, and even defined the idea of guy love in their very own duet! Carla wishes that someday Turk will love her as much as he loves JD while JD gave the ultimate romantic gesture when he told Elliot that he loved her more than Turk. When it comes to guy love, no one beats these two. Just look at the vid below. If you don’t hum this song and think of your best buddy, YOU’RE A ROBOT!
Historical Bros: John Adams & Thomas Jefferson
Honorable Mention: Octavian & Agrippa
John Adams was the second President while Thomas Jefferson became the third. It’s quite fitting for these two good friends who first met at the Continental Congress in Philadelphia. Sharing a dedication to the founding of the new United States, they developed a close friendship that spanned decades. Friends to the end, they were true bros, dying within hours of each other on July 4, 1826.
Entertainment Bros: Matt Damon & Ben Affleck
Honorable Mention: Seth Rogen & James Franco
Who can forget the scene of happiness when Matt Damon and Ben Affleck won Oscars for co-writing “Good Will Hunting?” The two grew up within walking distance from each other in Cambridge, MA and have risen to stardom together in Hollywood. While Matt’s career continued to skyrocket with the Bourne Trilogy, Ben’s went down in a blaze of terribleness with his entanglement to JLo (their relationship spawned the used-too-often-and-lame mashing of couples’ names – theirs being Bennifer). Yet through it all, there’s no doubt that Matt was always by Ben’s side, cheering him on as he finally rose from the ashes to become a talented director. Let’s hope Matt can stay by Ben’s side as he avoids butchering the Batman role. Even better, Matt could join Ben as the next Robin!
Comic Bros: Batman & Robin (Original)
Honorable Mention: Luke Cage & Iron Fist (Danny Rand)
Speaking of Batman and Robin, there’s no bromance in comics better than that of Bruce Wayne and Dick Grayson, the original Robin. In terms of Batman and different Robins, there has never been as much love or animosity as between these two, and that’s true bromance. Sure, we have Bruce and Tim Drake, but their relationship is definitely more father-son. And now we also have Bruce and Jason Todd, but that’s more father and um…psycho ex-sidekick? With Bruce and Dick (I know, try not to laugh at the name), there has always been love and respect, but the communication has always sucked. Yet even though they might have started off in a father-son relationship, they have grown to be equals. Sure, there were ups and down since they first teamed up waaaay back in the Golden Age of Comics (1940 to be exact). It even got to the point where Dick left to get out from Bruce’s shadow and became an awesome hero in his own right (Nightwing). But when the going gets tough, they always had each others’ backs. Recently, when Bruce “died,” Dick took up the mantle as the new Batman for a period. After Bruce Wayne, no one commands as much respect within the Bat Family as Dick Grayson.
Mythical Bros: Achilles & Patroclus
Honorable Mention: Gilgamesh & Enkindu
You know that’s true bromance when your buddy is willing to take down a whole city to avenge your death. Greek mythology’s Achilles and Patroclus gets the top spot in this category for the sheer love shared between the two. In the story, Patroclus dons Achilles’ armor and helps the Greeks fight back the Trojans to protect their ships. However, once the Trojans started retreating, Patroclus followed them back too far and was killed by Hector. In his grief, Achilles, who did not want to take part in the war, rejoined the Greeks and killed Hector. He then went on to desecrate Hector’s body by dragging it around the city gates of Troy. Now that’s love and grief right there! While it’s been argued back and forth whether their love was an example of romantic love, it’s never been confirmed so in this category, they take the top spot.
Fiction Bros: Frodo & Sam
Honorable Mention: Sherlock Holmes & Dr. John Watson
Frodo and Sam’s journey into Mordor might have only become more well-known because of Peter Jackson’s awesome Lord of the Rings trilogy but their story has been around much longer than that. Their journey together forms the centerpiece of the Lord of the Rings. Without their friendship, there’s absolutely no possible way the One Ring could’ve been destroyed. Sam helped Frodo throughout the whole journey, even when it was bleak. For a period, Sam even took up the Ring when he thought Frodo had died. But he eventually rescued Frodo, gave him back the Ring, and they continued on their way to destroy it – two small hobbits, all by themselves against the might of Mordor.
Legendary Bros: Robin Hood & Little John
Honorable Mention: King Arthur & Sir Lancelot (although it did not end well)
We all know the story of Robin Hood and Little John. They met on narrow wooden bridge. Little John wouldn’t let Robin cross. They had a duel with sticks and Robin lost. Then they had a belly laugh (har har har) and afterwards, Little John joined Robin Hood’s group of Merry Men (what a stupid name). Through all depictions and iterations of the Robin Hood legend, there was always Little John, whose name was an ironic testament to his humongous stature. And while they never mentioned who the best man was at Robin and Marion’s wedding, you can bet your bottom dollar that Little John was it!
Movie Bros: Saul & Dale (Pineapple Express)
Honorable Mention: Bill & Ted (All Bill and Ted Movies)
With alliterations in their names, Saul Silver and Dale Denton of Pineapple Express are the ultimate bros in the bromance of all time! They both have a love of weed, and they…well, ok, weed is the only thing they have in common. But their shared adventure throughout the movie is what eventually forged a bond so strong, Red could not even come between them. For a time, it seemed that this bromance was one-sided with poor Saul always playing the role of unrequited suitor. But we realized the depth of Dale’s love when he carried Saul out of the burning farm…in his underwear. With banter like below, you know their bromance was real.
Saul: This is like if that Blue Oyster shit met that Afghan Kush I had – and they had a baby. And then, meanwhile, that crazy Northern Light stuff I had and the Super Red Espresso Snowflake met and had a baby. And by some miracle, those two babies met and fucked – this would be the shit they birthed.
Dale Denton: [smells the marijuana] Wow. This is the product of baby fucking.
Video Game Bros: Ryu & Ken
Honorable Mention: Shepard & Garrus
Ken and Ryu’s bromance plays out like the ultimate sibling rivalry. Trained by the same master, they would always be at the same fighting tournament (seriously, can’t one of them go enter a Mortal Kombat one or something?). Despite pummeling each other in every version of Street Fighter, they would always hug or make up or something at the end. There’d be some profound exchange and then one would walk away, knowing that the other would always be at the next tournament. What a magical bromance indeed!
Cartoon Bros: Fry & Bender
Honorable Mention (Tie): Stewie & Brian/ Homer & Barney
One’s a human, the other’s a robot. One’s from the past, the other’s from the future. Showing that bromance doesn’t have to be only between people of the same race, or even species, Philip J. Fry and Bender Bending Rodriguez form the ultimate slacker bros from cartoons. Channeling their best Bill & Ted inner spirits, these two are lazy, stupid, and AWESOME! Fry lives in Bender’s “closet” and is the only human Bender shows affection. Fry, likewise, considers Bender his closest friend and has gone through quite a bit to help Bender in his time of need. While a robot should not have emotions, Bender has gone on record and said he loves Fry “the way a human loves a dog.” Awww.
That’s the list. Agree with it? Hate it? Let me know in the comments section!